I used to do some work for a business that taught massage therapists a new approach to bodywork. Using new techniques they became better therapists and this benefitted their clients who received deeper and more healing bodywork. The office of this company had a large board that was filled with glowing testimonials to how great the training courses were.

Everyone associated with the company was encouraged to think positively, always aware of the great things that the company stood for. The more massages people received using their approach, the more the world would improve. We were on a mission to help the world!

Occasionally a letter or email of complaint would arrive in the office. Most businesses at one time or another receive criticism no matter how successful they are. Whenever a complaint came in, the head of the company would call the senders ‘negative’ people who were only there to moan and complain. The policy was that no complaint was to be taken seriously. The company did not need to deal with these ‘negative’ people who would not join in the positive thinking that the company required..

So these complainers would find that no matter how constructive their criticism was, their issues would not be addressed, and they would be in effect told to go away and stop being negative. They would then tell at least 10 of their friends about how badly they had been treated and what a shoddy company it was. This process harmed the company by putting a lot of potential customers off.

Shortly before the banking collapse one or two people told the banks that there was a big flaw in the sub-prime mortgage market which could lead to serious financial problems. These people were told to stop being so negative. The bankers were so busy making lots of money that they did not want to hear that the financial bubble could burst.

There is a big cult of positive thinking in many companies. Positive thinking can be very useful. If you have a goal in life it does help to think positively that you are going to achieve the goal, but there are times when positive thinking can be the wrong thing to do and can actually be harmful. There are times when it is appropriate to:

• Get mad when your boss fires you
• Realise when a project is not going to work out and needs abandoning
• Not throw good money after bad
• Feel disappointed when your sports team loses badly
• Feel sad when your relationship breaks up

To want to always be positive and upbeat is to ignore the basic nature of human beings. Life has many shades, many moods, many aspects. Yes, be positive lots of the time, stick with things when obstacles appear, feel love for your fellow human  beings and so on.

Negative emotions are not bad as long as you don’t hang onto them. Occasionally open your mouth wide and let out a great scream of frustration. It will make you feel better. Then get on with the rest of your life.

Related articles by Zemanta

• Bright-Sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America (takepart.com)

Image via Wikipedia

This has been a hectic week. I’ve been finishing my software project Life Manager Pro and also getting my house ready for laminate flooring to be fitted.

Sometimes it seems that there is just too much to do each day. Do you lead a hectic busy life? What does it take to just slow down and relax whilst still getting things done?

The secret is to only concentrate on only what needs doing now. If you have a hundred things to attend to then break them down into smaller sections. The two main categories that actions fall into are those that need doing next and those that can be done later,  perhaps in a day or two.  You then divide your next actions into contexts. A context can be a location such as your home or office, or equipment such as the computer or your telephone.

If, for example, you decide to do call actions you then sit with your telephone and look at the list of people that you need to call and dial the number of person one on your list. As soon as you start dialing forget about everything else that needs doing. There is only one action that needs doing now.  Simply relax and make the call.

A great deal of stress can arise from a feeling of being overwhelmed. Remember, you are only ever able to do one action at a time and that is the only thing that need occupy your attention. The rest is on a list. When you have finished one action cross it off the list and move onto the next action. Forget about the 99 other actions that need doing.

Obviously you need to system to take care of all this. The simplest way to start is with a pen and a piece of paper where you write down all the things that you need to do. Then you divide them into next and later actions before allocating contexts to your next actions.

If you try this system and it works for you then you will find yourself under less stress. You can then expand the system and really find out how easier life can be. Life Manager Pro is a simple yet effective software solution to organising all the things that you need to get done. It’s not yet finished. Come back to this site for further news in a few days.

More Stress Solutions

Related articles by Zemanta

• Why using ToDo Lists & GTD? (ithoughts.de)
• The antidote to exhaustion is wholeheartedness (flowingmotion.wordpress.com)

Time is a funny thing. On the one hand it appears fixed. A minute on my watch equals a minute on your watch.

On the other hand the way you perceive time varies.

Time appears to runs slow when you:

• Are watching water boil
• Are waiting for a bus when you are running late
• Are watching the second finger of a watch rotate.

Time appears to run fast when you are:

• Watching a great movie
• Playing action video games
• Falling in love

I am in the middle of completing a software program – Life Manager Pro. This involves many hours of computer coding and requires lots of concentration. When I am absorbed in this task time goes very fast.

The conclusion that I have come to is that when you are completely absorbed in some activity without any external distractions then your perception of time is that it is travelling fast. The dilemma that I find is that I want  pleasurable activities such as watching an episode of my favourite TV series Lost or playing a great game, to last longer than they do?