Description:
Commentary on Stoicism, Paganism, bipolar disorder, and politics, along with photography and personal reflections from The Eye of the Storm.
Contents:
Happy Hallowe'en!
Since today marks five years that I've been married to my loving wife, I don't have a lot of time for Internet-related stuff. I did, however, want to wish everyone who reads this a safe and happy Hallowe'en / Samhain, and wanted to leave you with this article, from Dana Corby writing to TusconCitizen.com.
Categorized as: Religion
Scottish monument to honor executed witches
I read this article from the Observer, about plans in Scotland to erect a monument to people who were tortured and killed for being witches; and was left with a feeling of, 'It's about time' - I think something like this should go up in more than just one country. However, after further thought, I realized that the greatest monument to these people (whether they were in fact witches or not) are the masses of Pagans and Heathens running around in the world today, being open about our beliefs, and not showing any shame or remorse for being what we are.
This kind of thing hits me in two places, because while I believe some of these people were tortured and executed for actually following a Pagan path; I also believe in some cases people were executed for being mentally ill. Had I lived during that time, I would probably have been served a double dunking before being hauled to the stake.
If this monument is ever erected, I would like to visit it and hopefully learn more about some of the people who were executed in that area; and I would hope that other people would come away from it having learned that persecuting someone for their beliefs, or for just being different (in any way) is wrong. Such a monument would find itself even higher on my list of holy sites to see than Stonehenge, which is saying something.
Categorized as: Historic | Religion
Top Ten Bipolar Blogs 2008
Recently, PsychCentral released its list of the top ten bipolar blogs for 2008. I was pleased to see some very good blogs on this list, but was troubled by the description for number five, Liz Spikol's The Trouble with Spikol. I don't have a problem with this blog being listed in the top ten, or even its placement within the list. What I have a problem with is that the blog was dropped in rank due to Liz Spikol's decision to open her blogging range to include topics outside of mental health.
When I first set up this blog, I told myself that I was not going to focus only on bipolar disorder. Oh, I would include posts having to do with it and other mental health issues; but I wanted this blog to be a statement of what is on the mind of this particular bipolar, and that includes things other than bipolar disorder. I made this decision because I felt like someone wanting to learn about bipolar disorder might benefit from coming away with the knowledge that we have our own lives, our own interests ... that there is more to us than our illness.
I was reading Liz Spikol's blog when she made the decision to start including political views and 'cute fixes', and I thought her decision was a courageous one. So I have to disagree with Sandra Kiume (who wrote the article for the top ten list), and say that I think The Trouble with Spikol belongs on this list not in spite of her branching out to other topics, but because of it.
Categorized as: Manic Depressive | Rant
Bipolar chat?
Does anyone know of a good chat room with a focus on bipolar disorder? If so, where is it, and what chat client do I need to get to it?
Categorized as: Manic Depressive
Atkins diet, entry 3
This will be a short entry because I don't have all that much to say. My weight loss has hit a wall, and it's all my fault - I was naughty this past week, on two separate days, and I'm now trying to get my system back into its weight loss mode. I didn't really gain all that much from my naughtiness, maybe a kilogram or less, but I'm frustrated that I caused my weight loss to stop. Like I said, I know it's my fault ... but that doesn't ease the frustration.
What does ease the frustration was that I was very good about cheating on my diet ... I didn't just cheat with a slice of bread or something lame like that, I went to Subway and had myself a proper chewy-chocolate-chip cookie; and on the other day I had a bag of roasted, candied almonds and crêpes with homemade jelly!
In for a penny, in for a pound!
So this week I will refocus my will and avoid Subway and the local fair, and maybe next week I'll have some better news to report.
Categorized as: Stultiloquence
Sarah Palin vs. Witchcraft
Interesting article, with some interesting video of Sarah Palin having hands laid on her by a Witch hunter (linked at the beginning, and occurring around 7 minutes 15 seconds into the video). The whole thing, to me, is just one more reason why I think the mixing of Church and State is a bad, dangerous idea. The Witch hunter in the video actually talks about Jesus wanting to "infiltrate" society on multiple levels, of all things. With that in mind, I'm fighting an image of Jesus in grey camos, skulking around with a spy kit and night goggles ... and even this Heathen knows that this just isn't Jesus. How this didn't cause the media frenzy that Rev. Wright's sermons caused is beyond me.
Categorized as: Politic | Religion
Saturn diagnosed bipolar
Astrologically, my ruling planet is Jupiter. Now it seems that, astronomically psychologically, my ruling planet may be Saturn, with roiling, Earth-sized cyclones at either pole.
Categorized as: Physic | Stultiloquence
Ever wonder if?
I'm wondering how the world would have turned out if there hadn't been continental drift ... if Pangea had remained intact, and people would all live on the same continent. Would our cultures be more similar, would there be more or fewer wars, would world cooperation have changed, how would world exploration have changed? Just something that crossed my mind today, while watching CNN ... any thoughts or ideas?
Categorized as: Questions to Readers | Stultiloquence
Stoic reading, p.4
Chapter four of Stoic Serenity deals primarily with the nature of the Universe. In the third chapter, we are told the Stoic creed was to live according to Nature: both human and universal. The third chapter deals with the human aspect of Nature, the fourth chapter deals with the universal aspect of it. I have admit a small amount of disappointment with this chapter - normally my mind thoroughly enjoys contemplating the cosmos, but this chapter was tough for me to get through for some reason. That being said, it was still a valuable and informative chapter, from which I made some important connections.
The Universe, according to Stoics, is composed of two elements: matter and cause. The Universe is viewed as a living, intelligent being, of which we and our world are only miniscule parts. The Universe has a soul, which is called 'God' (sometimes 'god'), of which our minds are also a part; and which is the ultimate explanation for everything. I'll add what I think is an informative quote from Marcus Aurelius (from book 4, chapter 40, Meditations):
Constantly think of the Univese as a single living being, comprised of a single substance and a single soul; and how all things issue into the consciousness of this being, and how it accomplishes all things through a single impulse; and how all things work together to cause all that comes to be, and how intricate and densely woven is the fabric formed by their interweaving. This also brings us to the Stoic notion of fate, in that it is pre-ordained for us long before we come into being by this same densely-woven interweaving of things that come together to cause all that comes to be. Which brings us to a final point learned in this chapter: that to the Stoics, the Universe, its history, God and fate are all pretty much the same thing.
On a religious level, being a Heathen and hard polytheist, I'm having some trouble with this chapter's concepts ... it might explain why I've had so much trouble reading it, if my mind was already resisting the material on principle. The concept that I'm stuck on is that the Stoics consider the Universe to be made up of one thing only, in the end, and that is God. This is a very monist perspective, one that differs sharply with a dualist perspective that suggests the Universe is also made up of spirits / gods that can interact with matter of their own volition. While I am prepared to believe in the Universe (or as I usually express it, Nature) as a living and intelligent being, I believe there are gods existing between us and Nature who can interact with us. I am also prepared to believe that these gods are fragments of Nature, just as we are - in fact, this is how I have already been believing for years. But to embrace monism is to give up my gods, and I'm not willing to do that. Thankfully, I don't think Stoicism requires that I do anything more than understand that the Universe is a single, intelligent being, of which all things are merely a part ... and I don't think I'd be the first polytheist Stoic, if I look back at the history of Stoicism.
Stoic Reading
Preface
P. 1
P. 2
P. 3
P. 4
Runes - raidho
 Raidho : Journey / Undertaking (path and vehicle)
Riding is said to be the worst thing for horses;
Reginn forged the finest sword. (Norwegian Rune Poem)
Riding is the joy of the horsemen
and speedy journey
and toil of the steed. (Icelandic Rune Poem)
Riding seems easy to every warrior while he is indoors
and very courageous to him who traverses the high-roads
on the back of a stout horse. (Anglo-Saxon Rune Poem)
The Rune poems are almost completely in agreement about Raidho having to do with journeys. Two of the poems, the Icelandic and Norwegian Rune Poems, also mention that the journey is the labor of the horse. The Anglo-Saxon Rune Poem deviates slightly by focusing on the concept that riding seems easier from within a hall than it does astride a stout horse on a high road. Then there is the seemingly incongrous reference to Gram, the impossibly sharp sword given to Sigurd by Regin, in the NRP.
But it’s not that simple, not the way I read and take all of this. First, what is a journey? Is it traveling from one point to another? Must this be limited to physical travel, or can it be a metaphor for any progression from one point to another? I take the meaning of ‘journey’ to represent an undertaking, an endeavor to move from one point to another physically, cognitively, metaphorically or metaphyiscally; the path is all that's encountered during the journey, or the experience; and the vehicle is whatever carries something or someone along the path. Looking at it this way helps to unravel a few of the lines in the poems. First, the double reference to horses, and that reference to Gram. Horses, when you are riding, are the vehicle. They get you from one point to the other, or they transport your things. Horses are the vehicle of a journey. Keep in mind also that ’steed’ is part of a kenning for ships, another kind of vehicle. Gram, the sword reforged by Regin for Sigurd, was meant to carry Regin’s vengeance to his brother, the dragon named Fafnir. That was Regin’s undertaking, his endeavor - to kill his brother, kill Sigurd, and take the hoard of gold for himself. That very same sword that he forged, along with the pupil he tutored and intended to betray, are what killed Regin. So I take the references of horses, Gram, vehicles of an endeavor or undertaking, to be those parts of a journey that require careful attention. A horse can be overworked, a sword can eventually point backwards, a journey becomes much harder to complete when your vehicle ceases to function - or functions against you.
Then there is the reference to bravery in the ASRP. On the surface, saying that riding seems easy to those indoors, and is a matter of courage to the one actually on the horse on a high road, seems to say that riding is easier imagined than done. And I think that’s a very good message, and a wonderful bit of wisdom to remember. However, it doesn’t seem to blend all that easily with the theme of the first two poems. Until you think again about the necessity of courage, when sitting astride a stout horse out on a high and narrow road. This points directly to that same need to keep a wary eye on one’s vehicle that the first two poems allude to…and admonishes us to consider the road, just as much as the vehicle, on our journey or undertaking.
So, while I do interpret Raidho to refer to journeys, I feel it focuses much more on the vehicle and the path involved in the journey, and our need to pay these things special attention. That can be in the physical, metaphysical, or metaphoric sense…any sort of journey involves a vehicle, and that vehicle needs to be cared for, and the path carefully observed.
The Runes
Fog pictures
A few weeks ago, around the beginning of Autumn, we were fortunate enough to have a nice fog roll in. Since it's been a while since I posted any photographs, I thought I'd post a couple and, as always, I hope you enjoy them ....
Categorized as: Photographic
Atkins diet, entry 2
It's been two weeks on the Atkins diet, and I'm still feeling pretty good about this decision. Since last week's entry, I've dropped another two kilograms, in total. I say 'in total' because I actually gained a little weight for a few days, then held it steady, then finally started to lose again. I'm not sure how it happened that I actually gained weight on this diet, but it's something I'm going to keep my eye out for because I don't want it happening again.
I am not above admitting that there have been some things I've missed. Mainly, I miss being able to just eat whatever I'm in the mood for ... whether it be a slice of bread, or a Snickers bar, everything that isn't meat basically packs consequences with this diet. As such, my days of eating without thinking are a few weeks behind me. What makes this doubly hard for me is that I think it's very possible I was self-harming with food. I don't know that for certain, but it's something I suspect. I miss a few foods in particular, foods that are usually not far from my thoughts; but I enjoy moving around with 7-10 kg less than I had a few weeks ago a lot more, and think I can hold out and resist the temptation of these foods for a good while longer.
I've been careful about which of my doctors knows I'm on the Atkins diet; and I don't plan to let any of my doctors know how much and how fast I'm losing. My reason for this is last year, I put myself on a diet modeled around the Subway diet ... I just modified it to make sure I was taking in all major food groups, in essence, I modified it to make it healthier. My body took to this diet like a fish to water, and I started shedding weight more rapidly than I'm doing now. When I proudly told my doctor what I accomplished, he was nearly apoplectic and told me to come off the diet immediately, that it was harming me to lose so much weight so fast. He even suggested that I should have a Snickers bar or two, to get my weight back up. Well, turns out that was damning advice: I broke my diet that day and started gaining weight again. The lesson I learned was to be more selective in what I tell my doctors.
Categorized as: Stultiloquence
Happy WMHDAY!
Or, for those who aren't into acronyms, happy World Mental Health Day! How many of you readers actually knew it was today, or that the day existed at all? I didn't, not until Beetrootsoup's latest post from Am I Still Ill? popped into my feed reader. Oh, I knew there was a Mental Health Day ... I just didn't know it was global, and I never bothered to find out what day it was on. Does that make me a bad mentally ill person? At the very least, it makes me not-so-well-informed and slightly apathetic.
I'm curious to find out what, if anything, any of you did to observe this day?
Although not with the intention of observing any kind of event, I did wind up taking some time to sort of intellectualize today - feeding my mind with good stuff, and giving it a bit of exercise. I did some reading, worked on some computer-related problems, and I worked on some photography. I listened to some decent music (a bit of Vivaldi, a bit of Celtic music, followed up with some Godsmack and Staind as I write this post). I also spent some time contemplating my new therapist, and the psychoanalytic therapy I'm about to start ... if anyone reading this has experience with the psychoanalytic approach, I'd welcome your thoughts, especially if you happen to be bipolar or have suffered massive psychological trauma.
I also spent some time trying to contemplate the direction my life's going - bizarre as it may sound, that Tarot card I drew yesterday really made an impact - but this was one problem that was so loaded with uncertainties that I couldn't make very much headway. I did, however, resolve to stop trying to tackle that problem head-on, and start attacking the uncertainties instead. Something my new therapist suggested to me was that part of my problem may have to do with a change coming over me, a change that I'm resisting ... I suspect figuring out what that is will be the biggest step in determining which direction my life should go, but as I said, first it's time to take out some uncertainties.
All in all, I don't think I could have spent the day more appropriately even if I'd known it was WMHDAY from the very beginning!
Categorized as: Manic Depressive | Psychologic | Questions to Readers | Stultiloquence
The Hermit
After getting inspired by Flawed Plan to start playing around with Wordle, I found myself happy to take a quiz today, about which Tarot card represents me. This bit of inspiration came from Manic Witch, over at Meandering Musings of a Manic Witch. I was expecting the answer I get almost every other time: the
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